Many new parents have challenges getting their baby to sleep. When you have two little wonders, these challenges are magnified ( I would say doubled, but I don't think that this accurately reflects just how overwhelming it can feel) and you often are left seeking answers. Now, unless you have a solid support network of people who have been through it, you may find that you feel quite alone. The internet and books can be helpful, and certainly, after giving birth to our two young fellows, we have met and been reunited with many friends who are in the same situation. However, at the end of the day (literally) you are in it yourself and we certainly struggled.
About a month ago, maybe more now, it's hard to remember, we set about trying to build a stronger routine for our boys, specifically around bedtime. We set out starting to adjust bedtime earlier and earlier in the evening often preceded by a bath and some reading (sometimes Winnie the Pooh, Dr. Seuss or Robert Munsch, but often something a little shorter). As we crept closer to a more reasonable time for all of us to hit the hay, the boys mounted a rebellion of mythical proportions. One day it just seemed like they had a closed door meeting, decided that this new plan was devious and not something that would be tolerated and so they would put a stop to it. Their protests mounted, often involving tears, sometimes smiles but the results were always the same, two very tired parents and two unhappy and overtired little men.
Each baby is different, and when you have twins, you will realize that each of them is different too. This becomes incredibly evident when it becomes times for bed. One of our boys loves story time with Dad, he would spend the entire time sitting and staring at me as I read through a book, complete with voices. The other, would much rather be coddled and held by mom and while he tolerates story time, it really isn't his thing. One thing that we found as time marched on is that our two boys did much better while in bed with us than in their crib. And there came a time when we looked at each other and said, is this really worth it, and the answer was no. So for the last few months we have been sharing a bed with our two sprawling little men and things have been great. It certainly helps that neither of us is a restless sleeper and nothing is truly as rewarding as falling asleep with your little boy cuddled up next to you.
Now I know what you are thinking (or maybe not)...Isn't co-sleeping frowned upon, and the answer is yes...but we have decided to ignore the "surgeon general type" warnings and put our own sanity and the happiness of our little men first. And since making this decision, I must say we are all sleeping a little better and being a little happier, not to mention the fact that there is something amazing about waking up with your child right next to you. For a while, we didn't really talk about this with other people, and even once we did, it was with an essence of guilt. I would say, even now we aren't overly comfortable just blurting this out...although, once this blog is published, I guess that's out the window. All this is to say that it was important for us to make a decision that was right for us and each family should feel that they have the same right to do so.
So my little cover stealing boys, now that you are sharing the bed with us I think there are a few important life lessons you can learn. Number 1, if you are going to let one go...which you will...it is important that you attempt to create an opening to vent , otherwise you may trap something under the covers that will confuse and disgust your bed mate...This is an even more important life lesson as you get older...Number 2, remember that life is about making good choices for you and your family. Sometimes this will buck the trends or even go against something that is recommended, the important thing is that you take the time to make a rational decision that is in your (and in this case it's the royal your) best interests. Life is complicated and often the so-called experts write and comment based on generalities, this is helpful in informing our opinion but is not the be all and end all. I am glad we didn't listen, as not only are we all more rested but I am pretty sure that this stage of your life will be relatively short (in the sense that pretty soon you won't want me in your room let alone cuddling you to sleep) and it has been nice to hold and comfort you to sleep.
Love,
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